I don't like feedback much and this is one reason why.  Too often, it seems like the feedback exchange means having to deal with personal contact which in some cases is never a good thing.  Either a seller won't leave feedback  until they get positive feedback first or as a buyer you get accused of nagging when you want a seller to leave feedback for you.

In general when you reach a certain feedback rating I don't think it really matters anyway.  Probably a couple hundred rating gives everyone an idea of what type of buyer/seller you are.  I will probably now go back to my philosophy of only leaving feedback for a seller once they have left feedback for me first.  As a seller, I leave feedback right after payment is received.

If I was in a pissy mood, I would probably buy that seller's cheapest item and then leave negative feedback.

actually I don't read anything "shitty" in that email.. sometimes if you have had a bad day then you can read anything in anything.. seems to be the case here.. however his last comment "Well what makes you think I
want to give you feedback now?" just wants to make you neg him doesn't it..

Honestly I don't care if people leave me feedback or not, I've never followed up people who don't leave me feedback( and sometime I have forgotten myself) but most of the times I do.. I have seen plenty of people with "bad" feedback sell are per normal so I don't see were it affects a lot of people selling/buying

Brette:)

This thread is shitty!!!

Grug Greyskin wrote:Don't get me wrong, that seller is a jerk, and I wouldn't buy from them again if I were in your shoes after that exchange.

However...

In the words of that seller, "All you had to say was 'could you please leave feedback for me as I have for you.'"

Would not go so far as to call your email "shitty," but it is not polite, either.  Between the lines, you are basically calling the guy a jerk for not leaving you feedback.  Maybe that wasn't your intent, but it is the way I read your email - and clearly the way the seller read it as well.  His response, of course, moved the discourse from mildly impolite to flat out rude, and was uncalled for.

I have to agree here.  The way I read the email you sent to him, it seems almost like you are trying to make him feel guilty for not leaving you feedback.  No one likes being put on a guilt trip.  He may have deliberately decided not to leave you feedback for whatever reason or it may just have been an oversight.  And it really goes a long way for most people if you throw in a "please" and a "thank you".  If you are overly polite at first and they dont reciprocate, then by all means stop being polite.

Mars wrote:As a seller, I leave feedback right after payment is received.

I wish all sellers were like this.  In my experience most sellers won't leave feedback until they have received feedback from the buyer first and even state this in their auction details.  I see it so much more now that sellers cannot leave negative feedback.  Leaving no feedback at all seems to be the best they can do against unhappy buyers.

beasterbrook wrote:actually I don't read anything "shitty" in that email.. sometimes if you have had a bad day then you can read anything in anything..

I dont read anything "shitty" in Aneoth's email either.  But because almost all of our communication is done electronically, people tend to find negative meaning where there isnt any.  You have to make more of an effort to make them realize that there isn't.  And having a bad day can definitely skew your disposition so that you will think everyone is out to get you in some fashion.  Probably why I think I am the only good driver in the entire DFW area after a crappy day at work.  

mbassoc2003 wrote:I don't give a damn whether people leave me feedback or not.

But a lot of people do unfortunately.  If I dont get feedback from a seller even after I have left them feedback, it doesnt make any difference to me.  There are more important things to worry about.

Gnat the Beggar wrote:I have seldom given feedback first (as a buyer) and now I doubt if I ever do it again.
If so, it would have to be someone I have dealt with before.

There is absolutely no reason why a seller shouldn't leave feedback first, when payment is received or the package is sent, whichever the seller prefers. The only reason to withold feedback as a seller that I can think of is if you expect there to be a problem. And if you expect your sales to be a problem you shouldn't be selling anyways. Leaving feedback as a seller is a matter of showing goodwill and faith in your customer. It demonstrates belief in your service and your product. If the buyer leaves positive or negative feedback, so be it. It indicates they are satisfied or unhappy with the seller's service. I don't ever intend to be a Powerseller, and don't see any need for anything other than honesty out of the feedback system on eBay.

SoulCatcher78 wrote:I suppose some sellers have an issue with negative feedback and that's what causes them to withhold until they see  something from the buyer....

If a seller has an issue with negative feedback, it's probably because they're an AH seller. Yes, there is the odd AH buyer that you have to bend over backwards to try to please (I can thing of 1AH I dealt with that just wouldn't be happy no matter what I did for him), but on the whole buyers just want a good honest efficient service, If a seller collects negatives regularly, they have to be doing something wrong.

Prufrock wrote:Your approach was not polite.  Had you taken the time to be polite this matter would have been resolved in a manner favorable to you.

However, I do not think your note was "shitty."  But electronic communication often comes across in a more negative manner.

The approach was not in the most polite manner but wasn't impolite either - it was just factual as a reminder.  You shouldn't have to write a reminder to a seller, kissing their a$$ and praising them for a great transaction for them to leave appropriate feedback for you.  A seller should also have a bit of a tougher skin when dealing with customers than to come across as he did in his response.

Mars wrote:
The approach was not in the most polite manner but wasn't impolite either - it was just factual as a reminder.  You shouldn't have to write a reminder to a seller, kissing their a$$ and praising them for a great transaction for them to leave appropriate feedback for you.  A seller should also have a bit of a tougher skin when dealing with customers than to come across as he did in his response.

A few of us thought Aneoth's email was impolite....a few of us did not.  Everyone has differing ideas about what is deemed polite and what isn't.  I dont think by wording the comment differently and adding a "thank you" could be construed as ass kissing.

I have a friend that apparently was taught that saying "blow it out your ass" is a polite way to respond to a request.  If he decides not to be "polite", well then no amount of thick skin is going to do any good.

You shouldnt have to send a reminder to a seller to leave feedback for a transaction regardless if you have left feedback for them or not.  Best option is, when someone hasnt left you feedback yet, assume they arent going to and leave it at that.  That way if you end up getting feedback later on, its a nice surprise.  If you dont get feedback....no big deal.

Gnat the Beggar wrote:
Martin,

Keep in mind that I had already left + feedback for that seller for each of the 3 listings over a month before sending my message.
And I did not feel that begging for something that should have already been done by the seller a LONG time ago was the right approach either.
I still do not think that I should have needed to ask for feedback at all.

Perhaps there can be a middle ground somewhere?
Which is why I am asking for Acaeum membership opinions.
I do not wish to read any more messages like the one he/she sent me from other sellers when (IF) I ever need to ask for feedback in the future.

Thanks for your response....

Still, this is your first contact with the seller on this topic.  Just remind him with a "please and a thank you" and it is done with.  This is not begging; this is not lowering yourself.  It's how you address someone you do not know.  The seller may have simply forgot or he is a power seller and extremely busy.  No skin off your nose to send a polite reminder.  Again, I did not find your message "shitty" and his response is that of a Jerk.  However, if your approach had been more polite this never happens.

Martin